overcoming fear with F.A.I.T.H.

lauren dee.
#mood

one thing that i have struggled with a LOT over the past five-ish years is having faith. especially faith in myself. as a Leo *ahem* i can definitely (and often do) exude the cocky confidence for which my zodiac sign is known. but most of the time, deep insecurity and feelings of imposter syndrome lay just underneath that mask of certainty.

me, to myself, about myself, up until recently (but still every once in awhile)

as i have begun to be more vocal and forthcoming about my journey towards mental wellness, this faux-cocky confidence has morphed into an authentic sense of self. i am finally able to be assured in my strengths and acknowledge my flaws without being overwhelmed by them.

i partially attribute this evolution to age and maturity. the big 3-0 is coming for me in August, and as rough as my 20s have been, i am embracing the next decade wholeheartedly.

me on august 4th, 2018.

i have also decided to stop letting fear hold me back. in the past, i have been my own worst enemy, as illustrated in the unfiltered journal excerpt from 7.8.2013 below:

sometimes, i think i’m scared to be great. scared to show how intelligent and fucking amazing i -can be- AM. scared of what? [that] people won’t be able to handle it? they already don’t like me…as much as i’d like to say i don’t give a fuck about that…it’s not even close to being true. maybe i don’t want to intimidate anyone? you know, i really don’t know. but maybe this is a partial explanation of why it seems i refuse to live up to my ridiculous fucking potential. nah mean? or nah? i’ll keep thinking on it…it’s a VERY interesting thought, is it not? ay look shawty, i’ma tell you what YOU told EVERYONE else: if you don’t want to be scared, DON’T BE SCARED.

https://keepitontheleaux.wordpress.com
potty mouth, much? sheesh.

yes, strong language, but fitting at the time for such strong feelings. while i still don’t feel that i have fully reached my potential [yet], i don’t want to be scared anymore. so i’m no longer scared…most of the time. and even when i am scared, i have learned to overcome my fear with F.A.I.T.H.:

F – Fear can be your Friend. (s/o to My Friend Fear by Meera Lee Patel)

A – Allow yourself to be uncomfortable; “Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.” Neale Donald Walsch

I – “I’m not afraid of storms, for I’m learning how to sail my ship.” – Louisa May Alcott

T – Take advantage of the opportunities that scare you the most, and realize that failure is an option.

H – Have something/someone/somewhere that grounds/centers you when fear threatens to overwhelm you

over the next few posts, i want to explore the elements of this acronym by discussing different types of faith: faith in self; faith in your squad; faith in a higher power; faith in the next generation; and faith in the process. in the meantime, let me know: what is *your* definition of faith?

❤️ lauren dee.